Secondary Characters: Not the End
{Jon Carp}
address: jcarp@med.unc.edu


Special thanks to Victor Naqvi and Heles MacAnemy







The truth is my one regret.--They Might Be Giants





	Let's get this straight, once and for all.
	Michiru loves Haruka, and Haruka loves Michiru.
	Any questions?



	Michiru had one.  Just one, though, and the doubt conflicted so 
greatly with what she knew in her heart to be true that when she did 
finally bring it up to Haruka, it was with her familiar joking manner that 
meant, "Hey, nothing's really wrong here."
	And the familiar joking manner was right.  It just took a little bit
to convince Michiru of that.
	"Oh, phhlppt," she raspberried (in reaction to a Haruka jibe about 
her leading on a handsome male admirer).  "Kind of like you and Setsuna, 
huh?"
	Haruka blinked.  Then she started to laugh, which ruined her 
delivery for the next joke.  "Me and Setsuna?  Bleah, that's like accusing 
me of trying to seduce my...ten year-old sister or something."
	Michiru raised an eyebrow.  "No, it's like accusing you of trying to 
seduce your incredibly beautiful ten year-old sister."
	"Beautiful, huh?  Maybe I should be worried about YOU and Setsuna."
	Michiru smacked her lover's arm playfully, but rather hard at the 
same time.  "Don't joke about it," she said.  "You're always flirting with 
her.  Sometimes I think..."  She trailed off.  What she had been about to 
say would have ruined the lightness of their conversation.
	"What?" Haruka asked, still smiling.  "What do you think?"
	"Nothing."
	"No, what is it?  I want to know."
	Michiru bit her lip.  "It's just...well..sometimes I think 
you...think she's prettier than me."
	Haruka did not respond.
	"Hauruka?"
	The blonde woman blinked.  "What?  I'm sorry, I was staring at your 
breasts and not paying attention.  Could you repeat that?"
	Michiru gave her a genuine glare.  "I said, sometimes I think 
that...oh."  Her glare quickly became joking.  "One of these days, I'm just 
going to kill you.  Just lop your head right off.  So watch it."
	"I'm sorry," Haruka said.  "It's a perversion of mine.  It gives me 
a feeling of power to tease the most beautiful person in the entire world."
	And from then on their conversation became much less goofy and much 
more romantic.  But, and here's the important part, ladies and gentlemen, 
they were smiling the entire time.




	Meiou Usagi rarely smiled, for the simple reason that she rarely 
felt like it.  Day in and day out she would go through her normal duties 
with an expression of bland seriousness on her face.  She only varied it as 
an attempt to make the people around her feel more comfortable.  It never 
worked.
	She would try to say something to one of the inners, Makoto for 
example, but soon she would see how uneasy she was making her.  Then she 
would quickly finish her business, politely say goodbye, drive home at 
exactly the speed limit, slowly walk upstairs to her room, and collapse on 
her bed and sob for hours.
	It wasn't fair.  Of course it wasn't, she told herself.  LIFE isn't 
fair.
	It used to be.
	The other outers had gotten used to her mood swings, but couldn't do
a thing about it, no matter how much they tried.  They didn't really care 
about her, anyway.  She wasn't nice enough to them.  She didn't love them 
enough.
	Once she had exhausted her tears, and just lay on her bed breathing.
	A light knock on the door, and Michiru slowly opened it and walked 
in.  She placed a steaming mug on the bedside table.
	"I brought you some hot chocolate," she said softly, sitting at the 
foot of the bed.  "Do you want to talk about it?"  The routine question.
	"No.  Thank you, though."  The routine answer.
	Michiru nodded and stood up.  "We're here if you need anything," she 
said on the way out the door.  She would never understand.
	Usagi was alone again.  She picked up the mug and took a sip.  It 
was good as always.  
	"You're depressing me," a gruff male voice said.  
	"Sorry, she said sarcastically.  "I wouldn't want to do that."
	Her god appeared in the corner of the room.  "It's your own fault, 
you know.  You made the decision."
	"I know."
	He shook his head.  "You're getting caught in the same trap," he 
grunted.  "I thought you were smarter than she was.  I thought you'd be able
to find a way out of it."
	"Well, I can't," she said.  "I never will."  She drank a rather 
large sip of her hot chocolate.  "It's what I deserve for being so naive."
	"That's Setsuna talking," Pluto muttered.  "She never listened to me
either."
	"Go away."
	"Usagi, pay attention to me for once," he said.  "You can do 
whatever the hell you want, here.  Just try."
	"But..."
	"No, shut up.  Trust me.  The world isn't any different just because 
you are.  You're still a good guy and you're still supposed to have a happy 
ending.  Just TRY.  And don't go crazy, like Setsuna did."
	He disappeared.  Usagi slowly finished her hot chocolate, but she 
didn't enjoy it.  At all.





	The inners were happy.  Very happy.  Happy without question.  Happy 
happy happy.
	Four of them knew from personal experience it would be a rather long 
time before they had a meaningful relationship with anybody.  And yet, 
happy.  No matter how bitter, angry, or sad they might seem at any point, 
they were still happy, because they were supposed to be.
	Their happy loving meeting had just broken up, and they had said 
their joyful goodbyes and gone their contented ways from Rei's cheerful 
temple.  Usagi walked in.
	Rei was sweeping the steps, humming some song she'd heard on the 
radio that morning and couldn't get out of her head.  It wasn't a very good 
song, and she didn't like it, but she still hummed it happily.
	"Hello, Rei," Usagi said.  Rei almost dropped the broom.  
	"Usagi!  What are you doing here?"
	"Nothing.  I..." she searched for words.  "Um...is the meeting 
over?"
	"Yes."  Something was wrong.  Either Usagi was late for something 
she intended to go to, or she was making small talk.  Either way it didn't 
fit Sailor Pluto's personality.
	"So..." Usagi said, slowly wandering around the room.  "How's...your
grandfather doing?"
	"He's fine," Rei said.  "Um...yeah, he's fine."
	Inside, Usagi was swearing up a storm.  She was failing at this 
miserably.
	"Is there some reason you came here, Usagi?" Rei asked.
	Shit.  Well, a little more stalling couldn't hurt.
	"Rei, tell me about Setsuna."
	"What?"
	"Tell me about Setsuna.  How do you really feel about her?"
	Rei blinked.  "I'm not sure what you mean."
	"I mean, how do you feel about her?  Is she your friend?"
	Rei nodded.
	"Your best friend?"
	Rei stopped nodding.  She thought about that one a minute.  "Yes," 
she said eventually.  "I think she is."
	"Why?"
	Rei folded her arms across her chest.  "Why not?"
	Usagi glared.  "It's important, Rei."
	Rei sighed.  "I don't know," she said.  "She just is."
	Usagi shook her head.  "That's not good enough.  That's not a 
reason."
	"She's...kind to me, I guess.  She's actually kind.  Not many people
are."
	Usagi nodded.  "I understand," she whispered.  "Setsuna is loving 
and innocent no matter what, right?"
	Rei nodded.  "I guess so."
	"She's not the only one, though," Usagi pointed out.  "Minako is 
loving and innocent."
	"Minako's my friend, too," Rei said.
	"Yes, but why Setsuna?" Usagi asked, more loudly than she intended. 
"What is it about HER?"
	Rei blinked.  Poor girl, Usagi thought.  This situation was so 
strange for her.  
	"Usagi?" Rei asked.  "You're not...crying, are you?"
	"No, of course not," Usagi said.  "You were saying, about Setsuna?"
	Rei sighed.  "I don't know," she said once again.  "She's just 
Setsuna.  Nobody could ever be like she is."
	"Are you sure?" Usagi asked. 
	Rei thought for a minute.  "Yes," she said.  "I'm sure."
	Usagi nodded.  "Thank you."  She turned her back on Rei and walked 
out the door.  She didn't start crying until she got home.



	
	Harukaandmichiru walked into the store happily.  They bought a pack 
of chewing gum.
	Haruka smiled at Michiru.  "I love you," she said.
	"I love you, too," Michiru agreed.  They had to reaffirm that once 
in a while.
	They took their gum outside.  Usagi was waiting on a bench, staring 
glumly at the sky through her sunglasses.  
	"Want some gum?" Michiru offered.  Usagi shook her head.
	"Why are you wearing sunglasses?" Haruka asked.  "It's overcast."
	"Not for long," Usagi answered simply.  
	"You think so?" Michiru asked.  "Good.  We've needed some sun."
	"Planning on sunbathing today?" Haruka asked, raising an eyebrow.
	"Wouldn't you like to know," Michiru said, grinning.
	Haruka grinned too.  "Why don't you show me lat..."
	"Oh, shut UP, you two," Usagi snapped.  "Why don't you just say what
you mean?  'I would like to see you wearing a provocative outfit.'  
'Really?  Will it lead to sex?'  'Yes, probably.  But first we have to 
flirt for about FIVE HOURS!!'"
	Michiru smacked Usagi's arm playfully.  "Oh, you're just a cynic," 
she said.
	"I'm much more than that," Usagi mumbled.  "Go have fun.  I'm fine 
here by myself."
	"You sure?"
	"Of course," Usagi said.  "I always am, right?"  She grinned fakely 
at them.
	They started to walk away.  They had gotten about five feet away 
before they heard her call.  "Wait,"
	"What is it?" Haruka asked.
	Usagi took off her sunglasses.  "Am I cruel?"
	Michiru blinked.  "What?"
	"Am I cruel?  Am I a bad person?"
	"Um...Usagi, why are you asking us this?"
	"Because I don't have anyone else to ask," Usagi answered bitterly. 
"I think I am.  That's what it is, isn't it?  That's what's wrong with me."
	"Usagi, there's nothing wrong with you..." Haruka began.
	"There's something more wrong with me than not," Usagi said.  
"There's no reason I shouldn't have everything that Setsuna has.  She's a 
good person, though, who would never hurt anybody or hate anybody.  That's 
the difference."
	"I don't understand," Michiru said softly.  "Where did this come 
from?"
	"We live in a world that rewards the good, sweet, pure people.  It's
impossible to be evil without eventually either dying or spontaneously 
becoming good.  Haven't you noticed that?"
	Haruka nodded.  "Yes, actually.  But that's just because we're so 
good at what we do, right?"
	"No."  Usagi sighed.  "It's because that's the way the universe is. 
 Don't you see?  We can't lose.  We have the best, sweetest, purest one on 
our side."
	She smiled bitterly at them.  "And it's not me."
	She walked away.




	Usagi had known it was a vile habit when she put the first cigarette
in her mouth.  Still, it had its uses, and maybe, if she was really lucky, 
she would give herself cancer.
	Hotaru, of course, was past worrying about cancer, and hated 
cigarettes.  Her passion for cigars, however, seemed to annoy everybody but 
herself.
	"Why do you have to smoke those stupid things?" she asked, appearing
from nowhere.  
	Usagi raised an eyebrow.  "Why do YOU have to smoke THOSE stupid 
things?" she asked bitterly.  
	"Don't be a grouch," Hotaru said, walking over to the window and 
opening the blinds.  "See?  It's a beautiful day."
	"No it's not," Usagi said, walking over to the window and closing 
the blinds.  "It's disgusting outside."
	Hotaru frowned.  "You need to wake up," she said.  "Open those big 
smooshy eyes of yours and take a good look around you."  She reopened the 
blinds and put her arm around Usagi, puffing on her cigar.  "It's a bright, 
colorful world out there," she said.  "You just sit in this big boring house
all by yourself.  That's not fair, you should be enjoying yourself.  Look.  
Outside, cherry blossoms sprinkle down on schoolgirls with oddly-colored 
hair, attractive people roam the streets with strange, interesting 
expressions on their faces, and bizarre speech balloons and symbols appear 
in midair next to emotional people's heads.  And you're never a part of it.
	"When's the last time a little picture or a symbol appeared next to 
your head, Usagi?  When's the last time your facial expression extended 
beyond the physical boudaries of your head?  You know what your problem is, 
girl, you have no sense of fun."
	The god Pluto appeared, puffing on a pipe.  "Yeah," he agreed.  
"We're worried about you, babe."
	"Oh, just go away," Usagi said weakly.
	"Nuh uh," Hotaru said.  "You're not participating."
	"Shut up."
	"Nope."  Hotaru grinned.  "Not until you do something fun.  Like...I
dunno...one of those big sweatdrop things.  Make one of those big 
sweatdrops appear on the back of your head, and we'll go."
	"Why?"
	"Because you can," Pluto said, grinning.  "That's the only reason 
you need to do anything in this wacky world."
	"Just imagine how boring everything would be if people couldn't do 
stuff like that," Hotaru added.
	Usagi folded her arms across her chest.  "I don't feel like it."
	"Oh, of course not," Hotaru said.  "You have no reason to, right 
now.  I'll give you one, though."  She cleared her throat.  "Ahem.  'I am 
smoking a cigar...AGAIN."  They both looked at her expectantly.  She 
scowled.
	"Oh, hey," Pluto announced.  "Now I am nagging you...AGAIN."  He 
smiled at Usagi hopefully.
	Usagi lit another cigarette.  "Listen to me," she said.  "Listen 
close, people, this is important.  I do not want to make a big stupid 
sweatdrop appear on the back of my head.  No matter what you do, I never 
will want to make a big stupid sweatdrop appear on the back of my head.  
You are bothering me.  Piss off."
	Hotaru shook her head.  "Sad," she remarked.  "It's just sad."
	"How the innocent have fallen," Pluto agreed.
	"Stop reminding me of that," Usagi said tensely.  "This is hard 
enough as it is."
	"Just try," Hotaru pleaded.  "You've always been perfect as you are,
but it's not working anymore to just be you.  So you have to change, if you 
want to be happy."
	"Change?  What...are you talking about?"
	"You're not the hero anymore," Hotaru said.  "You need to accept 
it."
	Usagi dropped her cigarette and stepped on it.  "I can do better.  
I can make everybody see..."
	"Think for once in your life, babe," Pluto said gruffly.  "Look 
inside yourself.  Your heart is no longer gold, and you have to live with 
it."
	Usagi smiled bitterly.   "It's not fair," she said. 
	"It's not supposed to be," Pluto said.  "Of course there's a bias 
towards goodness.  But right now you're not anything.  You can play a role.  
You don't have to just sit there in the background like an idiot.  You're 
BETTER than Setsuna, babe.  All you have to do is try."
	Usagi lit another cigarette, dropped it, and stepped on it.  "If 
you will please excuse me," she said.  "I have to go."  She walked away 
rather quickly.
	"Did she listen to a word we said?" Pluto asked.
	"I think she did," Hotaru said.  She puffed her cigar.  




	Usagi sat in front of her mirror.  She felt the back of her head.  
It was dry.  
	She sighed.  "I can't believe this," she muttered.  "I used to be 
able to do it."
	She tried again.  Her head remained dry.  She clenched her fist, 
gritted her teeth, and puched the mirror.
	But stopped just before she made contact.  Her hand dropped down to 
her side and her eyes welled up with tears.  
	"WAAAAAH!" she wailed as two streams of salty water ran down her 
face.  

	Michiru put the mug of hot chocolate down on the bedside table.  
"Do you want to talk about it?"
	Usagi thought for a minute.  She picked up the mug and took a sip. 
"Sure," she said.




	The hairstylist blinked.  "Indigo?" she asked.
	Usagi smiled.  "Definately."
	"Are you sure?  I mean, if it's what you want, I'm happy to do it 
for you.  But your hair is beautiful the way it is."  The hairstylist 
grinned, pointing to her beige curls.  "I'd love to have mine blonde like 
yours is."
	"Indigo is nice," Usagi said.  "Not many people have indigo hair."
	"Yeah, but blonde is so PRETTY.  There's something so sweet about 
it."
	"I'm not paying you to make comments," Usagi said.  "Now could you 
get started, please?"




	Rei was sweeping again.  The floor seemed to be absolutely free 

from debris, but she kept going, absent-mindedly moving the broom back and 
forth.
	"Rei?"
	Rei looked up, and dropped the broom.  "Usagi!" she exclaimed.  
"Your...hair!"
	Usagi smiled nervously.  "Do you like it?"
	Rei examined Usagi's head.  "Um...yes.  Actually I do.  It's 
different."
	"I'm glad," Usagi said.  
	Rei picked up the broom.  "Uh...what are you doing here?"
	"No reason," Usagi said, her heart pounding.  "Just wanted to ask 
someone's opinion on the hair.  And...there's going to be a meeting soon, 
right?"
	"Yes."
	"May I attend?"
	Rei blinked.  "What for?"
	"I just...want to know what's going on with all of you.  I won't be 
intruding, will I?"
	Rei set the gun down.  "No, I guess not.  But...why?"
	"I should get to know you inners better.  After all, we're going to 
be creating a Utopian future together, right?"  She chuckled.  Then she 
stopped.  There was an uncomfortable silence.  "I feel left out," Usagi said
suddenly.  "I want to be a bigger part of your life.  All of you, I mean."
	Her cheeks were bright red.  She realized that it was an 
exagerrated, impossible blush.  Her hands shook.
	Rei noticed Usagi's cheeks, but not her hands.  She smiled.  
"Sure," she said.  "Come to the meeting."
	Usagi fell down.  She had taken a breath of relief, but in so doing
had also stepped where there was no step.  Rei rolled her eyes.  "How calm 
and mysterious," she muttered, rolling her eyes.
	Usagi's hands had stopped shaking.  She stuck an unnaturally large 
tongue out at Rei, then began laughing, her mouth suddenly taking up a good 
half of her face.  "I'm sorry," she said when she had calmed down.  
	Rei was going to respond, but noticed Ami and Makoto standing at 
the bottom of the stairs, looking up with expressions that would have said, 
"What the hell?" if they hadn't been young, innocent, happy girls whose 
expressions would never be vulgar.
	"Um," Makoto said.
	"Usagi?" Ami asked.  "Why are you here?  Is something wrong?"
	Usagi stood up, grinning.  "Nope," she said.  "I'm just visiting."








	
	It's a bright, colorful world, where even the villians have good 
hearts and nobody would dream of hating and everybody knows that this 
beauty will never end.
	Mercury.  Pluto.  Jupiter.  Moon.  Venus.  Uranusneptune.  Mars.  
And sometimes Saturn.  They were well into their eleven-thousandth lifetime.
 Untold years had passed since the founding of Crystal Tokyo, and they were 
still growing old and dying and growing old and dying just as always.  They 
would probably be granted their divinity within the millinium.
	Sailor Pluto, whose civilian name cannot be applied to the 
languages used today, told a joke.  Everybody laughed.
	



